His Mustache Smells Like Cabbage

Ambassador Bolton and his mustache
Ambassador Bolton and his mustache

If anyone has a mustache that smells like cabbage, it is this guy-John R.Bolton.  On Fox News, he is known as Ambassador Bolton. Any time there is foreign policy discussion on Fox News, Fox trots out the Ambassador with the stinky cabbage mustache as the leading expert.

More recently, the Ambassador and his hairy appendage that adorns his pie hole is being considered to fill the position of Secretary Of State by the President Elect with the apricot hue.

What are Ambassador Bolton’s and his stinky mustache’s credentials you might ask?

Do you remember how President Obama was harpooned by Fox News for recess appointments (appointments made by the President when the Senate is in recess)?

It seems that the illustrious Ambassador was a Bush recess appointment to that One World Order Communist organization known as the United Nations. He served as UN Ambassador from June 2005 until August 2006 (a lofty foreign policy career of an entire 14 months) when he resigned to avoid the embarrassment of his recess appointment not being confirmed by the new session of the US Senate.

Prior to becoming an Ambassador, he avoided combat in Vietnam by joining the National Guard, and later writing, “I confess I had no desire to die in a Southeast Asian rice paddy.” Thank goodness he is still with us to deliver his neo-con dribble on world affairs on Fox News.

The Ambassador, whose hero was NC Senator Jessie Helms, also has a few other notable accomplishments. As a member of the Reagan Justice Department, he fought financial compensation to Japanese Americans held in internment camps, fought to preserve Reagan’s executive privilege, and was involved in Iran-Contra.

That is a lot of stinky cabbage in my book Mr. Ambassador.